First Christmas
by AZGirl
Summary: The first Christmas after his mom died didn't really seem like Christmas at all. Five first Christmases in Mac's life. Chapters 1-4 are pre-series. Chapter 5 takes place during season 3.
1. Chapter One: Dad

**Spoilers:** References to information episodes have revealed about Mac's life pre-series.

 **A/N:** Each chapter is named after the person Mac is spending the Christmas with.

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"There is a first time for everything." ~~~~~ Anonymous

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 **Chapter One: Dad**

The first Christmas after his mom died didn't really seem like Christmas at all. In fact, nothing had been the same since she'd died earlier in the year.

Angus knew Christmas was coming due to the calendar, and he'd heard other kids talking about it at school. But where other kids had a tree, stockings, and lights on their houses, his house had none of that. No decorations. No Christmas music. No cookies or other treats being baked. Nothing.

It was as if his dad was trying to pretend the holiday never even existed, and never mentioned anything related to Christmas. While the thought of spending Christmas without his mom only made him miss her all the more, not celebrating the holiday she loved so much and ignoring family traditions made him feel like he was losing her all over again.

When his dad would get the mail, he'd rip in half, and then throw away any Christmas cards that had come that day. At first, Angus had thought his dad had thrown a card away by accident when he threw the junk mail away. He'd fished the envelope out, and had left it on the kitchen table when he sat down to complete the far-too-easy math worksheets his teacher had assigned. The next thing he knew, his father was ripping it in half while scolding him for being too sentimental about a holiday based on something that couldn't be scientifically proven.

After that, he didn't risk mentioning anything related to Christmas – or his mom. When his dad wasn't around, Angus would dare defying his dad to take a look in the trash can just to try and see who any cards were from. Most of the return addresses listed people his mother knew; he would've liked to have seen what the cards said.

The only other card he dared to fish out of the garbage was the one he discovered was from his grandfather. He was thankful the card had come with a bunch of other ones, because he hoped his dad wouldn't notice it was gone.

When he pieced the two halves together, Angus realized the card had been addressed to him alone. His dad had thrown out his mail! Inside the pieces of envelope and card was a $10 bill, which had also been ripped in half. He'd have to find out if he could still spend it when he next went to the library. He taped it together regardless in hopes it would still be accepted. At the time he hadn't known it would be his only gift that Christmas.

The card itself had a picture of Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer on it. Angus had loved it the first time he saw it last year. Because of his name and the fact he did well in school, he often felt like a misfit – just like Rudolph. He hoped someday he would find friends, ones who accepted him and didn't shun him for stupid reasons.

Before his dad got home that night, he hid the card and $10 bill in the pockets of the suit he'd worn to his mom's funeral. He knew his dad would never look there because it would remind him of his loss. That suit ended up being where he hid all projects and homework related to Christmas after his dad ripped up the only one he'd put up on the refrigerator. Apparently, even a good grade didn't matter in his dad's campaign to ignore Christmas.

For a while, Angus wondered if his dad might be tricking him, testing him in some way since his father often liked to test him on anything and everything he learned. Last year, when one of the older kids at school had said Santa Claus didn't exist, his mom explained how it might still be possible the man was real if you took certain scientific principles into account. His dad had even joined in on the conversation, which had quickly become too difficult to follow in terms of the science being discussed. He'd decided to remain undecided until he had proof one way or the other. It didn't matter because his dad had asked him questions to see if he had been paying attention.

So, he had honestly believed it was a test of some kind and he would wake up on Christmas day to a house fully decked out for the holiday. There would be Christmas presents around a decorated tree. They would have roasted turkey for dinner. His stocking would be full of hot wheels, fruit, and candy.

On Christmas morning, excited that it was finally here, Angus ran down the stairs expecting his house to have transformed into a place his classmates would be jealous of, but it hadn't happened. The house was exactly as it had been when he'd gone to bed the night before. There was nothing even remotely related to Christmas anywhere in the house – except for the things he'd hidden from his dad.

That year he got no presents other than the $10 his grandfather had sent him. His dad pretty much ignored him the entire day. His eyes filled with tears, but he knew it wouldn't do any good to cry. For him, Christmas was in name only that day.

He ended up spending Christmas in his room all by himself eating PB&J sandwiches and reading book after book, occasionally wiping stray tears off his face and the pages of his books.

Before that day, he thought he'd missed his mom a lot, but that first Christmas without her, Angus realized he missed her more than anything to do with the holiday.

Christmas would never be the same again now that his mom was gone.

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Next time _: Chapter Two: Grandfather_

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 **A/N:** To those who celebrate: **Merry Christmas!** To all: I hope you have a blessed day and enjoy the time spent with friends and family.

Many thanks to Celticgal1041 for proofing! Any remaining mistakes are the fault of evil elves. ;o)

 _ **Thanks for reading!**_

 **Disclaimer:** MacGyver is not mine. I'm just borrowing the concepts and characters for a little while.


	2. Chapter Two: Grandfather

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 **Chapter Two: Grandfather**

The first Christmas after his dad went away – and didn't come back – was almost completely different than the one after his mom died.

In the five years since that first Christmas without his mom, his dad began allowing a little bit of Christmas back into their lives year by year. Not much overall – a small table-top tree, fruit in his stocking, and a couple of presents – but just enough that Angus no longer felt like he was completely missing out.

That first year without his dad, his grandfather didn't ignore Christmas, but instead encouraged it to be celebrated, though not to the degree his mother had done things up. No one did Christmas like his mom.

His grandfather wasn't really one to decorate, but he did help in making a popcorn string to decorate their little tree. For the topper, Angus put the star he'd made with a paperclip and the help of the Swiss Army knife his grandfather gave him. He also made a few other shapes for the ornaments; it began the tradition to hang his paperclip creations on their Christmas tree.

They hung up their stockings as well as any Christmas cards they received, which weren't very many by this point. His mom's friends had forgotten about him, and his dad never liked the idea of greeting cards in the first place. The few cards they did receive were from friends of his grandfather, and his new friend, Bozer, had given him one too.

It wasn't much more than previous years, but at least it still felt like Christmas. He didn't have to hide anything Christmas related from his grandfather, and he didn't have to be the only kid who didn't bring anything to his classroom's Christmas party, something his father had deemed a waste of time better spent learning things.

Not wanting to be different than the kids who still had a mom, Angus asked his grandfather if they could bake something for the classroom party instead of buying something at the grocery store or at a bakery. His grandfather had hemmed and hawed at first, not wanting to make a mess of the kitchen, but in the end had agreed to bake something "simple."

That year Angus learned baking is a science as well as an art, something that appealed to his love of chemistry. He learned how important sodium bicarbonate, also known as baking soda, was to the process of baking when he accidentally forgot to include it in his first attempt at making cookies. Apparently, sodium bicarbonate plus heat creates carbon dioxide which helps to make the dough rise. Without it, or any other leavening ingredients, the end result was not worth mentioning and not good enough to bring to his class party.

It took a couple of tries, but Angus and his grandfather managed to make a pretty decent batch of walnut chocolate chip cookies. His classmates actually ate the cookies which made him happy, though he still missed the cookies his mom used to make.

That first year with his grandfather, he received a couple of presents which dwarfed the tiny tree. The majority of his gifts all seemed of the type his father would get him, ones that focused on learning scientific principles, making him think for a couple of days that his dad might come home. He tried not to be disappointed when his dad stayed away.

He was grateful for his gifts, especially the fact he had a couple more than what was usual for the past several years when it was just him and his dad, but Angus had been hoping for something which had no other purpose but to be fun. His grandfather had loved his gift; Angus had repaired the man's old turntable with some spare parts he'd found in the garage, and they played the few Christmas records they had several times that day.

Angus missed his father a lot, and didn't understand why his dad had left, often wondering if it was his fault and trying to figure out what he'd done to make him leave. He had written to Santa – just in case the old guy really did exist – asking for his dad to come home, but apparently his letter had gotten lost along the way.

He didn't hear from his dad at all that first Christmas – or any of the Christmases after that.

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Next time _: Chapter Three: Jack_

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 **A/N:** To those who celebrate: **Merry Christmas!** To all: I hope you have a blessed day and enjoy the time spent with friends and family.

Many thanks to Celticgal1041 for proofing! Any remaining mistakes are the fault of the Grinch!

 _ **Thanks for reading!**_


	3. Chapter Three: Jack

**A/N** : This 'first' is Mac's POV of part of another story of mine called _Jack's Collection_. I don't think it's necessary to read it in order to understand this chapter.

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 **Chapter Three: Jack**

The first Christmas with Jack was his last one in the Army. They'd had a rocky – to say the least – beginning to their friendship, but over the months they'd known each other, Mac couldn't help but develop a fondness for the older man.

When Jack had signed on for another tour instead of going home to Texas, Mac knew he'd never be able to properly thank his Overwatch, now friend, for such a sacrifice, or repay the debt he felt he owed. He'd tried though in big ways – making sure he didn't get them both killed – and in little ways like letting Jack have more insight into his personal life.

From the first time he'd spotted Dalton with one of his paperclip shapes – a replica of the man's sniper rifle – he knew he had to give the man a chance despite the misunderstanding they'd had when they first met only days prior. He hadn't meant to leave it in the mess hall, but had forgotten it when he'd finished his meal, not wanting to bend it when he'd sat down to eat. When he saw Dalton pocket the paperclip rifle, expression indicating he thought it was cool, Mac decided to give the man a break. Even if they couldn't be friends, then at least they would be good brothers-in-arms for the remainder of Dalton's hitch.

Back in Mission City, so few people ever thought his paperclip creations were anything but dumb or a waste of time and materials, that he'd long ago hid the fact he still made them. He couldn't help himself. Years ago he'd realized manipulating paperclips into various shapes helped to center him and calm his thoughts. While focusing on making a new shape, his mind relaxed and he was able to figure builds out or solve other problems. His grandfather and Bozer were pretty much the only people who seemed to like them, so they knew he still made them, but no one else did. Or hadn't – until Dalton found the one he'd accidentally left behind.

After that, Mac had purposely began leaving his little sculptures in places Dalton might come across them just to see if the older man really liked them or if he just liked the fact that the first one he'd seen had been a rifle. Other soldiers also ended up finding the creations he'd started leaving behind; the majority had discarded or destroyed them, but Jack seemed to get a kick out of them and even pocketed a couple more.

MacGyver hadn't known Dalton was actively trying to figure out who the sculptor was until he'd accidentally given the game away with his need for a paperclip to disarm an IED. Given the way the older soldier had asked about disarming bombs with paperclips during their ride back to base, Mac knew Dalton was fairly certain he was the paperclip sculptor.

Even after he realizes Dalton pretty much knows it's him who is making the shapes, Mac still makes them. He also continues to leave them in his Overwatch's path, often using them to express things to the older man he can't always get the words out to say. The day after his Overwatch saved him by killing four enemy combatants with two bullets, Mac created a trophy-shaped sculpture as a thank you, leaving it next to the man's left boot. He couldn't help but wonder if Dalton knew that he knew the man thought he was the one who made paperclip shapes. He quietly chuckled when he considered how confusing the whole 'I know that he knows that I know…' bit was going to get if he ever had to try to continue that train of thought in the future.

And then Jack stayed. The man who never shut up about Texas and what he was going to do when he got home, decided to re-up – stayed – because of him. He didn't deserve such consideration, but felt blessed to have it – and to have a friend like Jack.

That day, the day Jack stayed, Mac decided to stop completely hiding his paperclip-shaping habit around his friend.

They never do discuss his penchant for reshaping paperclips into other things, even when he does it right in front of Jack. His friend seems to get what the paperclip shaping does for him, that each one is a thought brought to life via a tiny piece of metal or a way to deal with his job. Jack even learns to read the language of his creations, knowing when he's out of sorts in some way or another enough that they need to talk it through. It's been a long time since someone had understood him this well; in the back of his mind, he starts to depend on the older man's care and concern even knowing it will end when his hitch is up.

As time passes, Mac notices Jack's collection of his paperclip creations slowly grows, as does their friendship.

His first Christmas with Jack is low-key. The good news was that their unit wasn't on duty; the bad news was that the mess was serving Christmas dinner, which was probably going to be just as bad as last year's offering.

Jack got a couple of care packages as Christmas drew ever nearer, and his friend shared the baked goodies with him. While he appreciated and enjoyed what Jack shared of his family's gifts, Mac felt bad he could not reciprocate in any way unless Bozer happened to send him something. Jack appeared happy to share, and didn't seem to expect anything in return, but Mac wanted to let his friend know he was grateful for the taste of home – even if it wasn't his home.

As he shaped a paperclip into a Christmas tree, Mac let his mind wander in an attempt to figure out what he could give Jack in return for the goodies. And then it hit him.

He groaned at his stupidity. The answer had been in his hands the entire time. Mac raided his stash and got to work.

It took a few tries, but eventually he got it just right; he left the gift on Jack's pillow when the older man left for the mess hall.

Mac lagged behind a little at dinner, eating slowly so Jack would leave first, giving his friend time to find what he'd made for him.

When he finally gets up the courage to return to barracks and go inside, he sees Jack smiling, admiring the Christmas ornament he'd been given – a miniature version of the outline of the great state of Texas with a lone star suspended roughly in the middle.

Jack's smile gets even wider when he sees Mac enter their barracks, and they bump fists when he gets closer, saying "Merry Christmas." It could be said that Jack was acknowledging the fact that he knew who had created the paperclip ornament in his friend's hands, but Mac chose to think otherwise in order to keep up the charade about who knew what about his paperclip habit.

As they walk to the tent that's supposed to be showing a Christmas movie, Mac considers how lucky he is to be able to spend the holiday with a friend, even if their time as partners starts to grow ever shorter.

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Next time _: Chapter Four: Bozer_

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 **A/N:** Many thanks to Celticgal1041 for proofing! Any remaining mistakes are my fault! ;o)

 _ **Thanks for reading!**_


	4. Chapter Four: Bozer

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 **Chapter Four: Bozer**

The first Christmas with Bozer is his first in Los Angeles and his first living in the house he'd inherited from his grandfather.

In some ways, he's still adjusting to being home again. Sand was in its proper place at the beach instead of everywhere and _in_ everything. He wasn't trying to disarm bombs in order to save lives, including his and Jack's. He was still trying to get used to living according to his own schedule and sleeping in a comfortable bed.

When he'd been discharged from the Army, he hadn't been sure what he wanted to do with his life – and still didn't. He knew he didn't want to live in Mission City; it was a place too full of memories for him to be happy there. Living in the house he'd inherited in Los Angeles made more sense, and besides, Bozer had moved to the city two years prior.

It only takes a few days of living alone in the too-quiet house for him to decide to ask Bozer to be his roommate. Bozer had followed his dreams of becoming a film maker, but had yet to succeed and was working at various fast food burger joints. His best friend's apartment was not in the best area, so it made sense for the two of them to share expenses and be able to easily afford the utilities and upkeep. He couldn't help wondering who was getting the better end of that deal given Bozer's talent for cooking and for subtly keeping Mac from getting stuck too far inside his own head.

Bozer had been ecstatic to get the offer and had agreed practically before Mac could finish asking the question. Lease ended, stuff moved in, and only a couple of days later they were, as Bozer put it, roomies.

Living with Bozer after bunking in a dusty, stuffy, smelly barracks with a bunch of soldiers was a welcome change. They quickly got to know each other's habits and preferences again as well as learning what had changed for each of them in the years since he'd left Mission City.

As Christmas as approached, Mac began to seriously dread it.

Thanksgiving had been great. Bozer had decided to stay in L.A., so they'd had "Friendsgiving," inviting a couple of Bozer's current coworkers who didn't have anywhere else to go for Thanksgiving. Though Bozer's cooking was excellent as always, and his attempt at making a pumpkin pie turn out decently, the best part of the day was being surprised by Jack arriving late into their meal.

Though they'd emailed often, and even Skyped a couple of times, Mac had lost track of when Jack was due to be discharged from the Army for good. Now that he thought about it, his friend had probably planned it that way, but he couldn't be too irritated about that. Jack had gone home to Texas for "Thanksgiving, Part One", as he'd called it, and was ready for "Thanksgiving Part Two." Mac could've kicked himself when he'd seen the conspiratorial grin and wink Jack had shared with Bozer. Plus, it finally explained the extra place setting that Bozer kept 'forgetting' to put away. Except for one thing, it was the best Thanksgiving Mac had had in a long time, especially when he was surprised again by Jack announcing he was going to live in Los Angeles.

After Thanksgiving dinner, while they were quietly digesting their food, Mac had learned by accident that he was going to be alone for his first Christmas in Los Angeles. Both of his best friends were going home to visit their families, and he would be alone. Bozer and Jack had each tried to convince him to go with them to visit their respective families, but Mac didn't feel comfortable with either invitation for a variety of reasons, even if it meant being by himself on Christmas.

The day after Thanksgiving, he and Bozer had a discussion about his philosophy regarding decorating for Christmas now that he was a home owner. Discovering Mac didn't really have one – that his best friend thought having a Christmas tree and a stocking were enough decorations – prompted Bozer to ask if they could "do the place up right." Mac had been so amused by Bozer's enthusiasm to decorate that he told his best friend to go for it.

That same morning, Mac had searched for and found the box of Christmas stuff his grandfather had kept. When he presented it to Bozer, his friend had looked inside and quietly mumbled something about having forgotten just how bad it was. Mac pretended not to hear the words, thinking back to his first Christmas with his grandfather and being so grateful he'd been able to enjoy the holiday somewhat despite the circumstances.

In the weeks after Thanksgiving, and leading up to Christmas, Mac started noticing random new Christmas decorations popping up around the house. He would leave the house for a couple of hours, and when he got back, there would be something else. He had no idea where Bozer was getting it all, but he couldn't help but laugh at how tacky and cheap-looking some of it was. Yet, despite those qualities, Mac was really starting to warm up to the decorations.

Bozer had been kind of sneaky about it at first, starting with a bunch of strings of lights of various styles and colors. Some of them were even broken, but except for one, Mac was able to easily fix them.

One morning, when he returned from his run, he found a wreath made up of cheap-looking poinsettia flowers, which had been drowned in silver glitter, and had a silver bow printed with more traditional-looking wreaths. It was quite…hideous and totally tacky, but it made him smile, so he didn't put up a fuss about it.

Later, after Christmas, when he thought back to the day when he found that wreath, Mac realized Bozer had been testing him, seeing how far he could go with the decorations. Out of everything, the only thing he had unreservedly vetoed was the set that decorated the entire toilet to look like Santa Claus. It included a hat to cover the top of the water tank, the face on the front of the tank, the body on the toilet seat, and a rug that looked like legs. He didn't like the idea of Santa – even a fabric one – staring at him while he took care of business.

After the first wreath, others started showing up, along with 24-inch, plastic candy canes, and inflatable, outdoor ornaments. The day after he came home to the fake, 7.5 foot tall Christmas tree, Mac found a box of paperclips, some ornament hangers, and a list of requests for shapes for some tree ornaments. With a fond smile, Mac shook his head, laughed, and got to work on the list. Some of the requests took a while to complete, and some shapes challenged him, but on the whole, he'd had a lot of fun making them.

When the mugs shaped like Santa's heads, as well as the snowman-shaped mugs, appeared on the kitchen counter one afternoon, Mac finally couldn't take it any longer; he had to know where all this tacky, yet endearing…crap was coming was from.

The answer shouldn't have surprised him, but it did anyway. Bozer had been going to every yard sale, dollar store, and thrift store all over Los Angeles and its suburbs looking for just the right decorations for the house. Bozer said they could add more in future years and, if they chose to, have different themes each year.

Learning Jack had donated some money to the cause left a lump in his throat he had a hard time swallowing back down. Despite knowing the older man was moving to L.A., Mac was still afraid they would grow apart as friends. For some reason, the older man adding money to the decoration fund helped diminish that fear.

Mac knew what they were doing. All of the decorations, and putting them up around the house, were meant to distract him from the fact he was going to be by himself for Christmas. His mom, grandfather, and any other close relatives had all passed, his dad was God only knew where, and he didn't yet have many close friends in Los Angeles, so he didn't have many options for Christmas. Ultimately, he would be alone for the day in an overly-festive house.

The day before Jack and Bozer were going to leave for their respective homes, when the three of them were going to exchange gifts, his two best friends carried something huge, white, and furry into the house – a fake, stuffed polar bear. His friends both pointed at him and laughed at his expression, which he didn't dare ask about, being thankful neither of them thought to take a picture.

He decided he didn't want to know where they got the polar bear, and was just about to veto it when Jack stepped back outside and came back in with a gift bag, which he shoved at Mac. Inside, was a red-sequined cowboy hat lined with fake, silver-flecked white fur and an absurdly huge necktie decorated with Santas dressed like cowboys.

Bozer rolled his eyes after the confused silence began to run on too long. His friend snatched the hat and necktie from his hands and put them on the polar bear, which they had stood up against the wall in the entryway, too tired to carry it any farther into the house. With the Santa gear, Mac couldn't help but laugh – of course his friends would do something to make it so he wouldn't veto a decoration. Because no one wanted to deal with moving the heavy bear again after Christmas, it became a permanent fixture in the entryway of his house.

Bozer made his family's "famous" Christmas Pastrami, taking time out to explain its origins to Jack, who Mac could guarantee mentally checked out in the first 30 seconds of the tale. Mac tried to remember how many times he'd heard all or part of that story, but couldn't, and was okay not knowing for sure.

After their meal, they exchanged gifts. Because of all of the tacky, goofy décor, Mac had long ago decided to give gifts along the same lines. But first, Bozer had him and Jack open a gift – stockings for each of them. Mac had laughed at the duct tape which spelled out his name, and then practically choked on his egg nog when he saw Jack's stocking – a tube sock with Jack's name embroidered on it in black thread. They were perfect, and not empty, having been filled with some Christmas candy.

Mac's gifts had been received well. He'd given Bozer an apron with the Leg Lamp from _A Christmas Story_ on it which had the words "It's a major award" printed underneath the picture. He gave Jack sequined fuzzy dice for the older man's GTO, which were in Christmas colors.

Apparently, Bozer and Jack had gone in together for his gift. Besides the usual boxes of paperclips, they had gotten passes for all three of them to go to Disneyland for New Year's Eve, stating he would be able to indulge his love of physics on the rides and chemistry at the food carts and in the restaurants.

Inevitably, the little party had to break up so his friends could pack for their trips the next day.

On Christmas Eve, once Bozer had left and he was alone, Mac couldn't help but feel more than a little down. He tried watching Christmas movies, but when _A Christmas Story_ came on, he couldn't watch it and turned off the TV. The movie had only served to remind him of the apron, which then reminded him his friends were gone.

He went out for a long run, and came back a few hours later tired, dripping of sweat, and ready for a shower. When he got out of the shower, his phone was ringing – it was Jack. They had a good talk, but all the noise and chaos in the background only made him feel lonelier. Bozer called that night, which made things worse.

On Christmas morning, he didn't bother getting ready for the day and stayed in his pajamas, feeling like he wanted to go right back to bed and sleep through the day. Thinking of Christmases past, and how he'd never completely given in to despair, Mac decided he wouldn't do so this time either. Instead, he warmed a couple of sticky buns Bozer had made for him and sat outside on the porch, eating the sweet treats and looking out over the city.

About two hours later, his doorbell rang.

Not expecting anyone, he went over to the door and opened it. Mac was stopped short and struck speechless by the sight in front of him: a portion of the Bozer clan just outside. As Bozer's mom entered his house, she said, "If the mountain will not come to Muhammad, then Muhammad must go to the mountain." Bozer entered the house last, but he got the biggest, bone-crushing hug of the lot as Mac thanked him for what he'd done.

Having his house suddenly full of friends and family made all the loneliness, all the sadness which had been piling up evaporate in a matter of seconds.

The Bozers plus a video chat with Jack made that first Christmas in Los Angeles one of his best Christmases ever.

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Next time _: Chapter Five: Matty - James  
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 **A/N:** Many thanks to Celticgal1041 for proofing! Any remaining mistakes are the fault of being tired!

 _ **Thanks for reading!**_


	5. Chapter Five: Matty - James

**Spoilers** : This chapter references multiple episodes from season 3. If you haven't seen ep 3.10 Matty + Ethan + Fidelity, then you might want to skip this one until you have seen it. Includes a quote from episode 2.04 _X-Ray + Penny_.

 **A/N:** I know the show refers to Mac's father as "Jim," but in my head he's _James_ or _Oversight_.

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 **Chapter Five: Matty – James**

The first Christmas after he'd encountered his dad after so many years apart didn't go exactly as he'd hoped.

Over regular lunches, they had agreed to wipe the slate clean and start over in their relationship as father and son. However, things between them didn't always run quite so smoothly.

During the mission he'd helped his father attempt to get Luiz Gomez, head of La Ola cartel, James had lied to him about the true objective. His father had led him to believe the motive was to protect his son when in reality it was to gain intel on Jonah Walsh and the KX7 serum. He let that go, deciding to attribute it to James' habit of not reading people into every aspect of a mission.

After the mission, Mac began to hear less and less from his dad, but naively still hoped they would get to spend some part of the holidays together. As Thanksgiving approached without having spoken to his father, Mac had the feeling the older man would not be around, instead continuing his hunt for Jonah Walsh.

After his confrontation with the Ghost, Mac happened to be in the war room when James contacted Matty for some information. While waiting for the intel, Mac had taken the opportunity to ask his father about the possibility of meeting up for Thanksgiving or Christmas, assuming he wasn't out on assignment at the time. James, impatient for what he'd requested, barely acknowledged the question and certainly didn't answer it.

Mac sighed when his dad disconnected the call immediately after receiving the information he'd wanted. As Oversight, James had to know what he'd just been through, and yet there had been no inquiry about how he was doing. Granted, James had been on the job, but with only Matty there, certainly the personal question wouldn't have been out of bounds. Would it?

He'd had a great Thanksgiving with his friends and family, but he'd missed his father even though they hadn't spent the holiday together for more than 15 years. Imprudently, irrationally, and a whole host of other "-ly" words, Mac began to put all his hopes into spending some part of the Christmas season with his dad. He knew he shouldn't, but given his job, hope had always been something Mac had been powerless against.

In the weeks leading up to Christmas, there continued to be no contact whatsoever from his father. Only Matty ever heard from Oversight when the man needed intel. Matty always seemed hesitant to tell him that James had called in, but Mac was grateful to know his father was still alive. It was something he'd never known for certain in the years after his father had left him behind with his grandfather. So, despite the hurt the lack of face-to-face communication caused, Mac was thankful to Matty for the brief, proof-of-life updates.

Mac still did his job as best he could, but he knew he wasn't quite himself off the job. He sensed that both Bozer and Jack were worried about him, and wanted to talk to him about his dad, but so far they were holding off. Perhaps they, like him, were waiting to see if James would come through in the end.

He didn't.

Mac had been hoping for this Christmas, the first since he'd reunited with his dad to be different, but it wasn't. And yet, it was, which helped to keep the feeling his father didn't think him important enough or loved him enough to give up his quest for one day together from tearing him down.

Back when he was ten, he'd only had his grandfather and his new friend Bozer. He didn't add to his family again until Jack came along. These days, he had Riley and Matty as a part of his family, with Leanna as the new addition to it. His remaining blood family may not care to even call him on Christmas, but he had his family of the heart to help ease that all-too-familiar ache of missing his father, which only served to remind him of how much he still missed his mother.

Bozer had insisted they dress up for Christmas dinner this year, and as he was changing clothes, Mac thought about something his grandfather said to him more than 15 years ago: " _Well, your dad is a very smart man…But all those smarts, they come at a price. Sometimes a man like your dad can get so focused on what he_ thinks _is important that he completely misses out on what_ is _really important_."

At the moment, his dad was so focused on Jonah Walsh that he was forgetting he had a son he'd just begun to rebuild a relationship with. Time would tell if the fledgling connection they'd made would survive or wither and die.

They were waiting for Matty to arrive for dinner when she called them into the Phoenix. Mac loved Bozer, but maybe his friend needed to give up trying to cook and eat Christmas Pastrami on Christmas now that he was also a full-time agent.

From how Matty sounded on the phone, he was worried about her. And given the revelation, once they were in the war room, that she had a husband and that Ethan was in danger, it was obvious his worry had been justified.

The realization that he'd had no idea Matty had been going through the same thing as him in regards to a loved one being missing hit him hard. They both had had someone out in the world somewhere for _years_ , not knowing where they were, what they were doing, or even if they were still alive. He understood now more than ever why Matty had helped him to find out answers about his dad – she was seeking answers about her own husband.

They also ended up being the same in their heartache as well. Neither of their reunions had turned out as hoped. Neither of them would be spending the holidays with the people who'd been absent from their lives for so many years. Both men had returned only to leave again.

Mac knew about Jack comforting Matty, reminding her that she still had her family with her, but he felt he needed to tell her the same thing in person. As they each went their own separate ways, Jack gave him a look, as if he knew what Mac was planning. Mac grinned slightly and nodded that his friend was right. Jack grinned and gave him a thumbs up as he left.

Bozer went over to Leanna's place to exchange gifts, so Mac took the time to execute an idea he'd had on his way home. After finishing it, he wrapped it up in a piece of red tissue paper, and headed over to Matty's house.

He'd wanted to give his friend, sister, mentor, and sometimes mother-figure space to digest everything, but he also wanted to make sure Matty remembered she was not alone.

It took some time for Matty to open her door, the older woman probably hoping whoever it was would leave if she didn't answer.

When she eventually opened the door, Matty said, "Blondie, I don't want to talk right now."

"That's fine. I just…"—he gestured to the inside of her house—"May I?"

Matty nodded and opened the door wider, allowing him inside before leading him to her living room where there was a decanter of whiskey and a partially-full glass on the coffee table.

"What do you want, MacGyver?" Matty asked as she sat down.

Mac almost felt guilty for intruding upon his friend's grief, but given how tired, defeated, and miserable she looked and sounded, he had to let her know—

"We don't have to talk about…our most recent mission, but I wanted to give you this," Mac said as he reached into his coat pocket and pulled out the wrapped gift, handing it to Matty.

Without a word Matty unfolded the tissue paper to expose the paperclip ornament Mac had made for her – a Claddagh symbol.

Neither of them is Irish, but what the ornament symbolized was what he was trying to get across to Matty. Love, loyalty, and friendship. All three were aspects the Claddagh represented through the heart, crown, and hands which comprised the symbol. All three and more were how he felt towards Matty, and he wanted to make sure she knew that even if he couldn't say the words out loud.

He wanted to make sure she remembered that family comes in more forms than by blood or by marriage. In some ways, family of the heart had more significance than blood family. The one was formed by choice while the other was a random combination of generations of DNA that had been passed down. He hoped Matty was aware he thought of her as, chosen her to be a part of, his family.

Matty looked up from the ornament; her face was expressionless and yet searching at the same time. Mac allowed his face to reflect everything he was trying to say to Matty with the Claddagh, knowing words were inadequate in this case. Matty's face crumbled and a tear slid down her face.

"Mac, I…"—she wiped the tear away—"Thank you, Mac. This means a lot to me. You know I feel the same, right?"

Mac looked down at his lap for a moment, feeling overjoyed Matty also considered him family of the heart. Instead of answering, he lunged forward and pulled Matty into a tight hug. He might not be the best with expressing his feelings, but he could show her how much her declaration meant to him.

When they eventually parted from their hug, Matty said she wouldn't be hanging the Claddagh on her tree but would be putting it somewhere she could see it every day as a reminder of this day and her family.

Matty had barely finished asking Mac if he wanted something to drink when her doorbell rang. She gave him a suspicious glance, but he really didn't know who could be at the door, though he had a pretty good idea.

His friend opened the door to see Jack, Riley, Bozer, and Leanna standing there with countless bags of food in their hands. Chinese, if his nose was not mistaken.

Matty gestured for them all to come inside as Jack said, "Since we missed Christmas dinner again, and Bozer's Christmas Pastrami was ruined _again_ , we thought we'd try to make up for it with a little Chinese food a la _A Christmas Story_." Jack grinned, and added, "Hopefully, there won't still be a head attached on the Peking duck."

Matty locked eyes with him for a moment, looking annoyed before she smiled slightly and rolled her eyes.

"Come on Blondie. Let's go have dinner with our family."

Mac grinned despite the flare of disappointment about his dad's absence. This first Christmas with his father back in his life hadn't turned out like he'd hoped it would, but in the end, it had turned out even better. Though not their first overall, this first Christmas with Matty as a part of his family of the heart was more than he could've hoped for.

So focused on what he thinks is important, James was missing out on what was truly important, but Mac would no longer let his father's issues determine how he spent Christmas.

How you spend Christmas is a choice, and Mac chose to spend it with a house full of laughter, of friends and family, and people who loved each other. What more could he want?

 **ooooooo**

 _The End._

 **ooooooo**

 **A/N:** Would anyone be interested in a story about Jack leaving? When I heard that George Eads/Jack Dalton was leaving the show, my brain immediately started coming up with scenarios of how that might happen. I ended up writing a story about one of them, though I suspect it will become AU fairly quickly in the new year. Let me know if you're interested.

I proofed this one, so all remaining mistakes are my fault!

 *****Happy New Year!*****

 _ **Thank you to all those who took time out to read, review, follow, and favorite my stories in 2018! I greatly appreciate it! :o)**_


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